Comments on: Remote Controls, Part I http://internetzillionaire.com/2005/03/remote-controls-part-i/ Funny with a lot of zeros involved. Mon, 14 Dec 2009 22:13:11 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.9 hourly 1 By: DA http://internetzillionaire.com/2005/03/remote-controls-part-i/comment-page-1/#comment-1628 DA Tue, 29 Mar 2005 04:13:02 +0000 http://internetzillionaire.com/archives/2005/03/15/remote-controls-part-i/#comment-1628 Remote controls... now there's a topic close to any comedian's heart. My take on remote controls is this: I like 'em. I go against the grain on this one. A lot of people say smaller. I say bigger. I want a screen on the remote so that I can channel surf <em>on the remote</em> and then, when i find something I want to watch, I just switch to that channel. Also, I want everthing on there... I want to be able to browse a music playlist, search for artists, etc. Why can't my (theoretical) iPod be my remote for my stereo? But I also want them to be able to write newspapers and deliver coffee to homeless shelters. They should be able to speak my thoughts aloud in Spanish and French. A little smidge of cleaning up and cooking around the house wouldn't go unnoticed either. Remote controls… now there’s a topic close to any comedian’s heart. My take on remote controls is this: I like ‘em. I go against the grain on this one. A lot of people say smaller. I say bigger. I want a screen on the remote so that I can channel surf on the remote and then, when i find something I want to watch, I just switch to that channel. Also, I want everthing on there… I want to be able to browse a music playlist, search for artists, etc. Why can’t my (theoretical) iPod be my remote for my stereo?

But I also want them to be able to write newspapers and deliver coffee to homeless shelters. They should be able to speak my thoughts aloud in Spanish and French. A little smidge of cleaning up and cooking around the house wouldn’t go unnoticed either.

]]> By: CK http://internetzillionaire.com/2005/03/remote-controls-part-i/comment-page-1/#comment-1626 CK Tue, 29 Mar 2005 04:00:29 +0000 http://internetzillionaire.com/archives/2005/03/15/remote-controls-part-i/#comment-1626 Now that we're speaking about remote controls, I must profess my love for the button "All On". It takes away that horrible need of pressing the power button for both the TV and the digital cable box, ONE RIGHT AFTER THE OTHER. Can you imagine how horrible that must have been back in the olden days when people had to press two buttons back-to-back before they could watch their TV? Simply mind-boggling what these geniuses in the geek factory are coming up with nowadays. Can I just make another marriage observation? I've been married almost 5 years and somehow my wife always forgets that I like to watch sports. This past weekend, she simply could not understand how I could spend THREE WHOLE hours watching a basketball game. I asked her how she can spend 12 straight hours watching 6-year old episodes of Real World London. Of course the room remained silent after that. Now that we’re speaking about remote controls, I must profess my love for the button “All On”. It takes away that horrible need of pressing the power button for both the TV and the digital cable box, ONE RIGHT AFTER THE OTHER. Can you imagine how horrible that must have been back in the olden days when people had to press two buttons back-to-back before they could watch their TV? Simply mind-boggling what these geniuses in the geek factory are coming up with nowadays.

Can I just make another marriage observation? I’ve been married almost 5 years and somehow my wife always forgets that I like to watch sports. This past weekend, she simply could not understand how I could spend THREE WHOLE hours watching a basketball game. I asked her how she can spend 12 straight hours watching 6-year old episodes of Real World London. Of course the room remained silent after that.

]]> By: Krusty http://internetzillionaire.com/2005/03/remote-controls-part-i/comment-page-1/#comment-1621 Krusty Mon, 28 Mar 2005 23:35:16 +0000 http://internetzillionaire.com/archives/2005/03/15/remote-controls-part-i/#comment-1621 Does anyone else find that Solo barely speaks english anymore. I feel like he is some six foot tall blinged out rap star everytime I read his post. Does anyone else find that Solo barely speaks english anymore. I feel like he is some six foot tall blinged out rap star everytime I read his post.

]]> By: DA http://internetzillionaire.com/2005/03/remote-controls-part-i/comment-page-1/#comment-1620 DA Mon, 28 Mar 2005 22:39:49 +0000 http://internetzillionaire.com/archives/2005/03/15/remote-controls-part-i/#comment-1620 MR, you might need to check your birth certificate. I have a feeling that under further scrutiny it will indicate that you are the bastard love-child of Al Bundy and Paul Reiser. MR, you might need to check your birth certificate. I have a feeling that under further scrutiny it will indicate that you are the bastard love-child of Al Bundy and Paul Reiser.

]]> By: solo http://internetzillionaire.com/2005/03/remote-controls-part-i/comment-page-1/#comment-1618 solo Mon, 28 Mar 2005 22:22:05 +0000 http://internetzillionaire.com/archives/2005/03/15/remote-controls-part-i/#comment-1618 my bad guys, just joking mainly about her. but back to MR, it's all good playa', you bring home some cheddar, she brings home some cheddar. at least you're not writing about "where we gonna cop some blow next." anyway, i know you're devising a spread sheet as we think. keep on keepin on my neazy. my bad guys, just joking mainly about her. but back to MR, it’s all good playa’, you bring home some cheddar, she brings home some cheddar. at least you’re not writing about “where we gonna cop some blow next.” anyway, i know you’re devising a spread sheet as we think. keep on keepin on my neazy.

]]> By: Krusty http://internetzillionaire.com/2005/03/remote-controls-part-i/comment-page-1/#comment-1617 Krusty Mon, 28 Mar 2005 22:08:04 +0000 http://internetzillionaire.com/archives/2005/03/15/remote-controls-part-i/#comment-1617 Stop rubbing it in Solo. Stop rubbing it in Solo.

]]> By: solo http://internetzillionaire.com/2005/03/remote-controls-part-i/comment-page-1/#comment-1615 solo Mon, 28 Mar 2005 20:57:57 +0000 http://internetzillionaire.com/archives/2005/03/15/remote-controls-part-i/#comment-1615 am i the only man in the world who found a girl who truly likes to watch video games? this was a secret kept by her until i decided to go on a halo 2 binge. even i can't keep up with her desire for me to beat down the mongrel on ascension. in fact i'm starting to wonder if she's actually a girl. the only problem is, she refers to "us" playing halo now. ah, true love. am i the only man in the world who found a girl who truly likes to watch video games? this was a secret kept by her until i decided to go on a halo 2 binge. even i can’t keep up with her desire for me to beat down the mongrel on ascension. in fact i’m starting to wonder if she’s actually a girl. the only problem is, she refers to “us” playing halo now. ah, true love.

]]> By: furious http://internetzillionaire.com/2005/03/remote-controls-part-i/comment-page-1/#comment-1612 furious Mon, 28 Mar 2005 18:44:36 +0000 http://internetzillionaire.com/archives/2005/03/15/remote-controls-part-i/#comment-1612 As a man about to get married (April 29th), I have a keen interest in your struggles as a newlywed. I look forward to being in this brotherhood of "good times". lol As a man about to get married (April 29th), I have a keen interest in your struggles as a newlywed. I look forward to being in this brotherhood of “good times”. lol

]]> By: JR http://internetzillionaire.com/2005/03/remote-controls-part-i/comment-page-1/#comment-1595 JR Mon, 28 Mar 2005 14:45:36 +0000 http://internetzillionaire.com/archives/2005/03/15/remote-controls-part-i/#comment-1595 I'm not convinced he loves the me and the xbox equally. We're looking at a 70/30 split at best. I think we all know who's on the upside of the split. I’m not convinced he loves the me and the xbox equally. We’re looking at a 70/30 split at best. I think we all know who’s on the upside of the split.

]]> By: krusty http://internetzillionaire.com/2005/03/remote-controls-part-i/comment-page-1/#comment-1580 krusty Sun, 27 Mar 2005 23:55:30 +0000 http://internetzillionaire.com/archives/2005/03/15/remote-controls-part-i/#comment-1580 Ahh young Jedi you have so much potential. Once you have passed the two year mark, then and only then may you see the beginnings of the feminine side of the force. My wife has mastered it into a precision machine driving me into submission. First she can't actually eat wheat so everytime I eat a pizza in front of her I'm basically giving her chinese water torture. Daytime TV is the asshole of society and my sith lord of a wife manages to not only trick me into watching it but also has apparently more knowledge than I do about what I need to watch. But I have found victory by walking the path of logic. For all xboxing men out there microsoft has given us salvation. There is now a workout video game for women. This is the perfect "gap bridger" between the two hated rivals. Soon your wives will want their own xbox so that she can play while you do. Imagine nag free playing without the penalties of guilt and sex loss. Go and buy this beacon of freedom, I have spoken the word of the christbox peace out. Ahh young Jedi you have so much potential. Once you have passed the two year mark, then and only then may you see the beginnings of the feminine side of the force. My wife has mastered it into a precision machine driving me into submission. First she can’t actually eat wheat so everytime I eat a pizza in front of her I’m basically giving her chinese water torture. Daytime TV is the asshole of society and my sith lord of a wife manages to not only trick me into watching it but also has apparently more knowledge than I do about what I need to watch.
But I have found victory by walking the path of logic. For all xboxing men out there microsoft has given us salvation. There is now a workout video game for women. This is the perfect “gap bridger” between the two hated rivals. Soon your wives will want their own xbox so that she can play while you do. Imagine nag free playing without the penalties of guilt and sex loss. Go and buy this beacon of freedom, I have spoken the word of the christbox peace out.

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