Comments on: The Zoo http://internetzillionaire.com/2006/05/the-zoo/ Funny with a lot of zeros involved. Thu, 29 Apr 2010 21:28:41 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.0 By: Chris http://internetzillionaire.com/2006/05/the-zoo/comment-page-1/#comment-4671 Chris Sat, 03 Jun 2006 16:56:02 +0000 http://internetzillionaire.com/2006/05/the-zoo/#comment-4671 Back to flinging fecal matter, if there was some way we could make the feces non-smelly and more colorful, can you imagine the birthday party options that would open up? Pooball, instead of paintball... Paint your own pottery with poo... Pizza and poo milkshakes. This could broaden the zoo's mission in ways we couldn't even count. Voice overs are a good idea (I'm imagining Kelsey Grammer and Steve Buscemi); rickshaws and narrating gorillas are a great idea; What about parrots? They already talk, combine that with little people pulling the rickshaws and guest appearances by Steve Buscemi and Kelsey Grammer and we've got ourselves a zoo for the future! Back to flinging fecal matter, if there was some way we could make the feces non-smelly and more colorful, can you imagine the birthday party options that would open up? Pooball, instead of paintball… Paint your own pottery with poo… Pizza and poo milkshakes. This could broaden the zoo’s mission in ways we couldn’t even count.

Voice overs are a good idea (I’m imagining Kelsey Grammer and Steve Buscemi); rickshaws and narrating gorillas are a great idea; What about parrots? They already talk, combine that with little people pulling the rickshaws and guest appearances by Steve Buscemi and Kelsey Grammer and we’ve got ourselves a zoo for the future!

]]> By: Krusty http://internetzillionaire.com/2006/05/the-zoo/comment-page-1/#comment-4631 Krusty Thu, 01 Jun 2006 04:08:10 +0000 http://internetzillionaire.com/2006/05/the-zoo/#comment-4631 I'm seeing a great work oppurtunity for midgets. Think of the captivated masses listening to midgets in animal suits. They could even perform dangerous animal tricks. "Ohhh look mommy that little man in the penguin suit is sticking his head in the polar bear's mouth." Now tell me that isn't a platinum hit. I do agree with the centaur, when is the zoo going to install the moving sidewalk. I mean I have to pay outrageous prices to get in and you want to make me break a sweat. You can keep your snake house and huge monkey. I’m seeing a great work oppurtunity for midgets. Think of the captivated masses listening to midgets in animal suits. They could even perform dangerous animal tricks.
“Ohhh look mommy that little man in the penguin suit is sticking his head in the polar bear’s mouth.”
Now tell me that isn’t a platinum hit. I do agree with the centaur, when is the zoo going to install the moving sidewalk. I mean I have to pay outrageous prices to get in and you want to make me break a sweat. You can keep your snake house and huge monkey.

]]> By: The Captive Lion http://internetzillionaire.com/2006/05/the-zoo/comment-page-1/#comment-4610 The Captive Lion Tue, 30 May 2006 19:10:33 +0000 http://internetzillionaire.com/2006/05/the-zoo/#comment-4610 Ok, let me try to be constuctive for a change. I actually do think the information signs aren't a very useful means of education anymore. Or at least we can do better. There has been one option proposed--rickshaws pulled by gorilas who narrate the journey with bits and pieces of their life story. I see a second option--sound modulators placed on the throats of all the zoo creatures that turn all their hoots, calls, and neck movements into a cartoon voiceover provided by a well-known celebrity that tells the facts about the animal. The animals will tell us their own story but in a voice that is acceptable and instantly-likable to gelatinous young minds. Ok, let me try to be constuctive for a change. I actually do think the information signs aren’t a very useful means of education anymore. Or at least we can do better. There has been one option proposed–rickshaws pulled by gorilas who narrate the journey with bits and pieces of their life story.

I see a second option–sound modulators placed on the throats of all the zoo creatures that turn all their hoots, calls, and neck movements into a cartoon voiceover provided by a well-known celebrity that tells the facts about the animal. The animals will tell us their own story but in a voice that is acceptable and instantly-likable to gelatinous young minds.

]]> By: The Centaur http://internetzillionaire.com/2006/05/the-zoo/comment-page-1/#comment-4608 The Centaur Tue, 30 May 2006 16:54:56 +0000 http://internetzillionaire.com/2006/05/the-zoo/#comment-4608 Wait, what's this? Look, I don't have time to read these educational signs in front of the cages. Just lemme catch my breath. I just walked 8 miles from the last exhibit to get to this one. This zoo is so massive that I don't know if I'll be able to get back to my car before heat stroke sets in. Perhaps if this so-called "gorilla" was pulling me around on a rickshaw, I might be more interested in hearing his life story. Instead, I'm just going to pause here for a sec, look at the giant monkey, and then make my peace with god. Wait, what’s this? Look, I don’t have time to read these educational signs in front of the cages. Just lemme catch my breath.

I just walked 8 miles from the last exhibit to get to this one. This zoo is so massive that I don’t know if I’ll be able to get back to my car before heat stroke sets in. Perhaps if this so-called “gorilla” was pulling me around on a rickshaw, I might be more interested in hearing his life story. Instead, I’m just going to pause here for a sec, look at the giant monkey, and then make my peace with god.

]]> By: Krusty http://internetzillionaire.com/2006/05/the-zoo/comment-page-1/#comment-4584 Krusty Mon, 29 May 2006 22:07:43 +0000 http://internetzillionaire.com/2006/05/the-zoo/#comment-4584 Well wlecome to my everyday life. By working with kids in the outdoors I basically have this zoo senario going on everyday. My favorite thing is when one kid who doesn't know the diference between a xbox and a squirrel tries to impart his vast knowledge to another kid. Thi usually goes something like this. "Why do deer eat grass?" "OH YOU KNOW THEY NEED TO EAT GRASS BECAUSE IT HELPS THEM TURN THE RIGHT COLOR" The zoo is a great example of my new understanding that the general public is simply stupid Well wlecome to my everyday life. By working with kids in the outdoors I basically have this zoo senario going on everyday. My favorite thing is when one kid who doesn’t know the diference between a xbox and a squirrel tries to impart his vast knowledge to another kid. Thi usually goes something like this.

“Why do deer eat grass?”
“OH YOU KNOW THEY NEED TO EAT GRASS BECAUSE IT HELPS THEM TURN THE RIGHT COLOR”

The zoo is a great example of my new understanding that the general public is simply stupid

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