Comments on: The Bee Trap

By: Ryan

Ryan — Sat, 08 Jul 2006 16:24:11 +0000

I have the perfect trick. They will sell like hot cakes. Although I don’t really remember the day when hot cakes “sold really well”.

OK, so all you need is a jar, stick, & 2 feet of fishing line. Do you know where I am heading with this? OK, then keep reading. Capture the bee in the jar and put it in the freezer for about 5 minutes. This will stun the bee unconcious. Take it out of the freezer and tie the string to the stick. Tie the other end of the string to the unconcious bee around it’s torso but be careful not to block its wings. Wait a minute for the bee to wake up and immediately be rageful. then you have bee on stick. Oh ya, one last pointer. Make sure the string is not as long as the stick or else he will sting you.

By: mokemonster

mokemonster — Thu, 22 Jun 2006 19:12:38 +0000

1. buy a bonnet.
2. put a bee in it.

By: Krusty

Krusty — Tue, 20 Jun 2006 05:10:27 +0000

As the only one of us that actually knows anything about nature I feel obliged to point out the fact that what you have in that trap is a yellow jacket. Those traps are specifically designed to catch yellowjackets. These little bastards are non polleninating carnivores. They are slightly lawyers as the biggest waste of space on the planet. So in conclusion kill away kill away.

By: Steven Teskey

Steven Teskey — Sun, 18 Jun 2006 01:32:40 +0000

I have to hand it to Walt, that’s some crazy stuff he’s got going on there. Hey, if you feel jelouse just send the bees down to his circus and have’em wreck up the place, you know, show them who’s boss.

Or not.

By: The Centaur

The Centaur — Sat, 17 Jun 2006 04:53:49 +0000

Walt, if it is a game of oneupsmanship you are seeking I’ll have you know that I am already conceding defeat. Yep, I fold that easy.

For those that haven’t clicked on his site, I strongly recommend it…

By: Shizworth

Shizworth — Fri, 16 Jun 2006 17:15:47 +0000

Dammit Walt Noon, we need to combine forces here. Give them all contracts, endorsements, whatever… just train them man, train them!!!

By: Shizworth

Shizworth — Fri, 16 Jun 2006 17:11:19 +0000

Bee Olympics.
Even have a tagline, “All the buzz, all the glory.”

Apparently, you really like lemonade and kids are dumb enough to sell it. There’s a market here, folks. Stroll up to the nearest lemonade stand and test your pitch. Explain that each bee is hand-picked from another country but only a few are top contenders (OK, we sedate the bees and paint them in order to distinguish who’s who, but whatever). Kids pick a bee for $1 each and if their bee wins, they get everyone else’s “bee fee.” Gambling at its finest. Before doing so, you gotta sell ‘em on the events. A few come to mind– Swarm the Melon, the Pollen Vault, Spider Polo, Freestyle Sting. It will be all the rage in the ‘hood. Now GO!

By: Walt Noon

Walt Noon — Fri, 16 Jun 2006 16:54:29 +0000

It was suggested to me that you train them as a “bee circus” like my little “flea circuses” do with fleas…
I’m available for tips on insect training any time.
Trained bees could be quite a force! Perhaps the military could be interested and work it into their budget (I’d be game). Imagine solving our killer bee problem by training them to seek out terrorists and leave the country.
Your heroic bees would reach even those who have been unreachable by our best forces in the past, and provide good PR in the form of honey for those who deserve it at the same time.
Let me know if my fleas can be any help as well at flea-circus.com !
Good luck!

By: Chris

Chris — Fri, 16 Jun 2006 05:36:04 +0000

What about making a bee speedo? That should impress some ladies.

Or a ham and bee sandwich? A beecicle? Seems to have a nice ring to it.

Or maybe you can keep the bees, train them to infest other houses in your neighborhood and then sell your neighbor a bee trap for like $20 more than you paid for them. You could drive around the neighborhood with a bullhorn yelling, “Bee traps for sale!” or “Who wants a bee speedo?”

By: schepman

schepman — Fri, 16 Jun 2006 04:41:13 +0000

You could freeze them and then sell them to High School biology students every year during the anual “bug collection” rush. Yes, this tradition continues in many high schools across the state…