Touching Co-Workers Is Awkward

I would prefer if you don’t actually touch me when you are giving me a “pat on the back.” Just a nice “hover over the back” with your hand will suffice and let me know that you appreciate the work I do. Good. That’s settled.

7 thoughts on “Touching Co-Workers Is Awkward”

  1. I find that touching at work is purely circumstantial. If the new hot young women that tends to be very huggy wants to give me a pat on the back or a back rub, so be it. I won’t argue with good ideas. However when the three hundred pound gorilla that they pass off as the maintenance director wants to congratulate me on a job well done I would like to have enough warning to put on my biohazard suit. When you come down to it none of us get enough quality hot chick contact. Take it when you can get it. I suppose that none of you office monkeys work for a business that has ever had a hot chick even set foot in the door.

  2. Also, no thinking outside the box. The box is there for a reason people. And that reason is for thinking inside. Who ever heard of thinking outside the box? It’s moronic. What? Now your ideas can’t be confined by a 3-D cube. Shut up. Sit down. Get back in the box like the rest of us. There is plenty of room for thinking in here. I see ample thought space.

  3. “The box” is underrated… I mean, why even have a box if we’re not going to think inside of it? That’s what the box is for, people!

    You know what is overrated? Casual Fridays. Gimme a break. Wearing jeans on a workday. You call that casual? Casual to me is a bathrobe and bed head. It’s like the whole “fun size” labeling they give to miny candybars:

    Yes, I want the candy bar, just don’t insult my intelligence by calling this bite-size morsel “fun size.”

    Yes, I don’t want to wear Dockers every damn day, just don’t insult my intelligence by calling jeans and a polo shirt “casual.”

    I know the difference…

  4. I agree, casual friday is a farse. Those jeans just feel so much better, thank you so much management, I think that I’ll wait until monday to go postal. Why don’t we have margarita mondays, or whisky wednesdays instead, that would be a whole lot better.

  5. My office takes casual Fridays to the extreme level. I never noticed this until some guy started showing up in camo pants and a Trojan condom T-shirt. And as if this wasn’t bad enough, people are starting to walk around the office barefoot. I’m talking no shoes or socks. We already have a public health crisis occuring with the amount of communicable diseases being passed from one cube to the next, but now we have athlete’s foot to contend with! This all seems to pose no problem with management, however if you wear a freakin’ shirt without a pocket on Monday you get written up for not following the dress code. Makes perfect sense.

    Oh and I think literal pats on the back went by the wayside like 20 years ago.

  6. This is an interesting post, that’s for sure. My company decided that moving into the new year, it would really boost morale if we went to having casual Friday every week instead of just the last Friday of the month, so that was nice. Shortly after, they decided that casual Friday was getting too casual, with people wearing ripped jeans, sneakers (at least they wore shoes, I guess), and t-shirts. So we got the email that we could still wear jeans, but we should wear dress shoes and collared shirts. Thanks a lot.

    We actually have had three attractrive women step foot in the door since I started almost a year ago. One actually is a full-time employee, but she’s not in the actuarial sector, she’s a behavioral health consultant. One was a intern, and one was interviewing for an analyst position. That one was really hot, but apparently dumb as a box of rocks. So that’s been nice as well. At least I’ve seen one (or three) at work in a year.

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