Have we met? I’m Johnny Paparazzi. Cousin of Earl Snapshot. Ugly step-uncle to Willimena Candidcam. And you’ve just been invited to be a fly on the wall at my all-night pajama-jammie jam! With a name like Johnny Paparazzi, you can expect some serious celebs in the house and this year I didn’t disappoint. Let’s start this party off right!
Don’t worry, I’ll cook the bacon extra Keviny. Just how you like it.
Wash it down with a Gin and Connick! Better yet, make that a Shaved Connick. The Harry ones always make me feel fishy.
Don’t look at me with that Queer Eye!
Ok, it was fun straight chillin’ with the Queer Eye guys. Get it? Got it! Good!
Seth Meyers knows how to pose for Johnny. Here he is doing his famous blurry Sasquatch impression.
His buddy Horatio “Hornblower” Sanz was sans cool and posed for me. Say cheese-y grin!
Tina Fey and I had a heart to heart. I’ve now got the heart of a woman and she’s got the heart of a ladykiller.
Fred Armisen’s glasses aren’t a prop. He wears them all the time. That’s so non-lasiky.
Chris Parnell was all slumber and no party however. He didn’t say a funny thing all night. What’s new? (Oh, snap… just kidding Parnell.)
Andy Samberg partied so hard, he was gonna have a lazy Saturday and Sunday this weekend.
Kenan Thompson came in costume as the late/great Notorious B.I.G. No one told him it wasn’t a costume party.
Robert Smigel stuck his hand up Triumph the Insult Comic Dog’s ass again. Good times ensued.
Alan Cumming was not dressed as Nightcrawler which basically pissed everyone off. Including himself.
Mos Def challenged me to a pillow fight but I would never hit a man with J. Lo glasses. Def was on iTunes duty for the night.
Kevin Spacey was incognito as always. Here he is as an old Irish man.
Martha Plimpton, the girl from Goonies, crashed the party. But it was cool cuz she told me a secret about Sloth. He no longer worships Superman. He’s a George Clooney Batman dude now.
Spike Lee definitely was in the house. But he spent most of the time in the bathroom. Spike, leave some TP for the rest of us!
The richest man in town, Apple CEO Steve Jobs, was there for tech support. Don’t you hate being the only computer nerd at a party, Steve!
But the man of the hour was Dave Chappelle. He came. He saw. He broke out early. As always.
So can anyone guess where I’ve really been all-night?