The Super Blog

I’m in unchartered territory. The Seahawks are in the Super Bowl for the first time in their franshise history, and I am utterly unprepared for the event.

What should I paint on my chest? Sure, a phrase like “Go ‘Hawks!” might suffice in the regular season, but this is the Super Bowl. It seems like I almost need to get a tattoo or something.

What do I drink? Beer is a safe choice, but maybe I should bust out the bottle of top shelf gin I’ve been hiding from guests and saving for the proverbial Special Occasion.

And what if they win? How do I comport myself? I’ve never been in the position to celebrate a championship of any kind. Obviously, I need to push my couch into the middle of the street and light it on fire. Then, I suppose I am expected to head downtown and riot with the rest of the hardcore fans. Then what? Topple police cruisers? I wish they made a guidebook for novice sports hooligans.

I guess I’ll deal with these issues as the game progresses. One other note, I spent Super Bowl Eve thinking about the game, hanging my stocking, and formulating a prediction. Here it is: Seahawks 27, Steelers 17. That’s right, a ten point spread. And the MVP: Joe Jurevicious. 6 receptions, 2 touchdowns, 114 yards receiving.

So here we go. It’s noon, the game is three and a half hours away. Like the NFC championship game, I’ll be updating this post continually throughout the day. Let’s just hope the game and this blog live up to the hype.

94 thoughts on “The Super Blog”

  1. Centaur, you have gained a keen eye for the game in your MVP choice. I too believe Jurevicius will have a big game, especially since the 3-4 defense is designed in part to take away the tight end. Therefore a three receiver set lends itself to matchup advantages for the offense.

    At the same time, there is always this sinking feeling in the back of my head that Pittsburgh is going to turn this game into a blowout.

    No matter the outcome i’ll probably be crying in the end – either into my beer, or out of utter disbelief that the bumbling Seachickens are Super Bowl champs.

    Go Hawks!

  2. One hour til game time.

    I’ve set up shop in the Zillionaire’s Lounge, the bar I crafted in my basement for just such an event. Needless to say, having a bar in your basement is great, especially when you’re a raging alcoholic.

    Obviously, we’ve got the food and drinks covered. I just wish I had one of those tubular urine bags that truckers use, so that I could sit in one position all afternoon without having to bother walking to the bathroom.

  3. Perhaps the only underrated aspect of the Super Bowl being hosted in Detroit: The Motown Music.

    If they reunited the Commodores on stage for a rendition of “Night Shift” and the Seahawks won…

    We’d officially have the Unrealest Day Ever.

  4. Just cracked open the first beer of the day. A Red Hook ESB.

    Once the game starts, I’ll shift to Bud and Bud Light… just to have a makeshift Bud Bowl in my liver.

  5. I can tell in the first four notes: Aaron Neville and Aretha will produce an eight-minute rendition of the Star Spangled Banner.

  6. Coin toss time: Tails.

    Yeah. That’s right. See that Pittsburgh? That’s how you call a coin toss.

    Please don’t let this be our only opportunity to trash talk.

  7. A few first downs on the opening drive, and Seattle has to punt. We completely wasted the momentum of the coin toss.

  8. Still no score in the game.

    Here’s the score on the alcohol front: I’m on beer #2, Henry Weinhard’s Blue Boar Pale Ale.

  9. Pass interference on the Seahawks, negating a touchdown. So standard.

    No other franchise would have that call go against them.

  10. i’ve already broke a whole jar of el paso taco sauce due to anticipation. my girlfriend hates me cause i can’t stop yelling. i’m mad pissed they called that pass interference. oh yes, i’m feeling nice.

  11. 3-0, Seattle at this pt.

    I won $2 in the first quarter pool… looks like I’ve got a visit to a value menu in my future.

    Starting Beer 3, another Red Hook. If I’m going to be drunk and disorderly tonight, the foundation must be laid early.

  12. It was just revealed that Marquand Manuel is getting his groin taped.

    I hope they don’t have to wrap his groin in a cast.

  13. Imaginary touchdown by Pittsburgh.

    Anyone want to wager that it will stand, while an actual touchdown by Seattle is reversed?

  14. 7-3, Pittsburgh.

    The only bright side is that I’m positioned to win the second quarter pool as well.

    As they say, the house always wins.

  15. Who is this Number 28? He’s the best Pittsburg has- He plays both offense and defense for Pittsburg.

  16. Halftime:

    How did the Rolling Stones get cleared out of the nursing home?

    Is it possible to be a rock star with zero sex appeal?

  17. Btw, I’m a tremendous frontrunner.

    The frequency of updates on this post will be dictated by the Seahawks momentum.

  18. I just did a shot of Cabana Boy, as a tribute to the Seahawks narrowing the gap.

    Sorry Seahawks, if you want me to take a man shot, you’ll have to take the lead.

  19. For my sisters sake I hope you dont want to take a “man shot” But regardless I hope the hawks keep it going.

    Beer count, MR 5 Panda 9

  20. Alright, it’s 14-10, Pitt.

    I’m now drinking Bombay Sapphire.

    Stevens scored a td, but he’s had three crucial drops. We should see if the Patriots will trade the Diet Pepsi machine for him.

  21. Btw, the f-bomb count from my mom is likely understated, if anything.

    She turns into a drunken sailor at Seahawks games.

  22. Third qtr just ended, Pitt 14-10.

    Panda is collecting on the pool this quarter.

    Seahawks have the ball, with momentum. 16 minutes to determine whether I’ll be despondent, or setting police cruisers on fire tonight.

  23. Matt, are you calling me out in the middle of a game? A drunken sailor? I’m more like a slightly inebriated Sea Gal, minus the big boobs. (I am wearing my lucky SeaHawk earrings right now, who else can claim that?)
    P.S Can we bring back Steve Largent?

  24. The F-Bomb takes on new meaning while it spews from cheryl’s mouth along with a mouth full of whiskey and coke!

  25. The Seahawks are absolutely getting shafted by the “officials.”

    I can’t stand it. This is the most eggregiously one-sided officiating I’ve ever seen.

  26. For a football team that supposedly plays hard nose, smash-mouth football…

    The Steelers rely entirely on trick plays.

  27. Why aren’t they calling a penalty on the Steelers for having 12-13 players on the field on every play?

  28. I’m pleased to post the 50th comment on this post:

    I think the Seahawks still have a chance.

    I juste wish they could put the Burger King or The Freezer in the backfield.

  29. Fluid count:
    MR: 5 beers, a cabana boy, and a gin and tonic(make that a double)
    Panda: 10 beers a cabana boy and counting…..
    JR 1/2 gallon of apple juice
    VA: enough water to float a dingy
    Mathias: 4 beers and a cabana boy

  30. I think another shot is in order:

    Zillionaires, let’s raise our glasses to near unrealness.

    Panda, pour us another round of suntan-lotions-tasting Cabana Boy.

  31. Attn: All my friends in Seattle

    Regardless of the outcome, I still expect to see news footage of you rioting in downtown Seattle, with the obligatory overturning of a police cruiser.

    And yes, I’ll unabashedly continue using Burger King and Police cruiser jokes at this point.

  32. FYI:

    I’m at the point where I’m curious as to how many comments we can register on this post.

    Let’s set the bar high… let’s top 70 comments.

  33. 2 minutes to go:

    Seahawks need a TD, two point conversion, onside kick recovery, and then antother FG.

    Sadly, the Seahawks have missed two FG, and had a TD negated.

  34. Dear Pittsburgh,

    You won. Not convincingly, and certainly not fairly.

    Enjoy it as best you can.

    The Centaur

  35. yup, everybody get back to normal life. we’re not that sweet. never were, never will be. oh well, this proves there is a god. thank you for doing the usual. this is what me and mcsex used to refer to as, “standard.” is that really the usual boring monday coming tomorrow, oh, wait, yup. enjoy your non-winning life.

  36. I still feel like rioting… who’s with me?

    I have a baseball bat, cherry bombs, Roman candles and I’m impervious to pain right now.

    Oh, and I’ve got some rage I want to deal with unhealthily.

    Again, who’s with me?

  37. This will be the basis of my column tomorrow, but i must say i’m glad to be a journalist now. I forgot how difficult it is to be a fan. Today, I was an emotional wreck, changing back and forth on drinks of choice, sitting positions, swearing, depending on the ebb and flow of the game.

    Bill Levy and his officiating crew were brutal. A questionable offensive interference call on Jackson; a questionable TD by Rothlesberger; a phantom holding call on Sean Locklear erasing Stevens catch to the 1.

    BRUTAL!

    But, it so Seattle. Once again a team teases with our emotions only to leave us crying in our beer (which I am doing at this moment).

  38. Alright, I’ll gratuitously post the 80th comment on this post:

    I hope they let Alexander go. He was unspectacular when it really mattered.

  39. Jeannette, you’ll be happy to hear that Cage has been banished from the computer.

    I remember several hours ago, when all I hoped for was for Seattle to just not embarrass themselves, then just score some points, then a field goal, then a touchdown. Somehow, it all gets away from you, and then you’ll thinking the unbelievable will happen, and Seattle will win. We were so close……

  40. I can hardly see straight, let alone type I am so pissed off. I am going to do four shots of whiskey as soon as i am done typing this.

  41. Will someone please e-mail Bill O’Reilly, we have just suffered another injustice someone has to be looking after us. Have him interview the refs and the TV announcers; I want him to stop thier spin on the game.

  42. Everyone,

    I just wanted to let you know I was released from the hospital this morning. I had to get 280 stitches for headbutting through the glass of my TV last night. Thankfully I was so drunk and full of rage I didn’t feel anything.

    Thanks to everyone who sent cards and flowers.

  43. Glad to hear you are doing well.

    Maybe you can come visit me at Shady Acres. Josh brown is in the next room over. I keep hearing him say “The laces were IN”. Man that guy is crazy. But I am looking forward to the next month because the great nostradamus is coming to visit me and we are going on a cruise! I can’t wait!

  44. One final comment and then we’ll put this to bed:

    Booth sent over this link.

    Disappointingly, he takes the high road in this piece.

    I, on the other hand, rummaged around my garage last night until I located a pitchfork and lantern. If anyone else is up for forming an angry mob and marching to Pittsburgh, let me know.

  45. I have to say you have a great blog, i really enjoy reading it, i have bookmarked it so i can find it back

    Keep up the good work

    Greets
    Dave

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