One shot, one baby. That’s my motto.
My wife is pregnant, and it happened on her first cycle after going off the pill. That’s right, I am a sniper… in a baby-making sense.
I am about to divulge some personal information that I’m sure my wife would prefer I keep classified. It involves a covert operation, where I went deep undercover. When the time came for action, I didn’t have to think. My training took over.
My target was identified. I carefully lined her up in my sights, and took her down easy with a single shot. Nice and clean. The mark of a professional…
And a child was conceived. Mission Accomplished. And there’s nothing premature about this declaration.
Some people may question the sniper method, by saying “the fun is in trying to conceive.” Sounds like loser-talk to me. I’m simply incapable of finding fun in repeated failure.
That’s the kind of man I am. I get the job done. And it’s done discreetly (with the exception of a few posts on the Internet.) Even my wife’s doctor was impressed. Believe me, I took full credit for all of this. This is one sniper rifle that is not shooting blanks.
Author’s note: All puns in the above post were intended. Thank you. That is all.